Pressure Cooker

Okay, tonight, I am writing to vent.

know that I am lucky that I haven’t contracted Covid-19 and neither has my family. I know that I am extremely lucky to be able to work from my home (the hubs, too), and that I am getting a paycheck.

But, can we for one minute acknowledge that sucks? Continue reading

Winter needs to end

I am not built for winter.

It is an incredibly difficult season for me. I don’t know if it is the lack of sunshine, the limited amount of time outdoors, or a combination of all of those factors–BUT, I struggle with it every. single. year.

Right now, I really need a beach. All of the sun and sand and the melody of seagulls squawking and waves crashing in the background. It is my ultimate relaxation.

…But, a beach is not to be; at least, not until summer vacation. Continue reading

Are we ever really healed?

Summer has started and I have quickly discovered that I do not do well with rest and relaxation. That sounds crazy, doesn’t it?

Yet, it’s true. I find small things to feel stressed over. I find ways to make myself busy. I over-analyze people and what they say.

I struggle to just sit and enjoy the quiet and the calm.

I don’t do calm well. It isn’t the norm for me. Continue reading

It’s easier to hurt than to heal.

A funny thing has happened to me.

For years–my whole life, really–I kept all of my secrets. I rarely talked about what my childhood was like, or how hard it felt. When I did, I framed it in terms of my resilience…as in, Hey! All these things happened to me, but I turned  out okay. 

It wasn’t until almost two years ago (in three months I will have been in therapy for TWO YEARS…wow.), that I started to acknowledge things.  Continue reading